after
six
months
off
sick
i made it back
to my nhs desk
where the welcome back cards
were as absent
as the get well cards had been
and my inbox
was truly
a wonder to behold
~
there was fear in their eyes
like my incompetence was catching
and my frequent meetings in HR
like
a
rash
that could spread
~
i limped on for another six months
part time and useless
a leper to the union
till i was let go
with a £40 gift card
and a £50 debt
from a payday mistake
after
11 or 12
years
of being the best there ever was
~
tens of thousands unread
in that inbox
maybe a record
i
deleted
the
lot
that same day
and it felt like i struck a blow
against
some
undefinable
something
~
being let go by the nhs ?
very hard to achieve
but i did it
and everytime i look out
any of my back windows
i can see the hospitals admin tower
a blunt beacon
over
the
autumn forest
and i wonder
in vanity
if
anyone
looks
over this way for me
at all
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